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license class 2b.
to do a degree in english.
more lots money!!
lose weight!!!
modify my green baby.
be my fren.
multiply me.nadia b. nadia. wanie. nina. ain. queenbee. zee exclusive. belo chix. xiaxue the blogger. the critic. ijat snake.
2006.04
2006.05 2006.06 2006.07 2006.08 2006.09 2006.10 2006.11 2006.12 2007.01 2007.02 2007.03 2007.04 2007.05 2007.06 2007.07 2007.08 2007.09 2007.10 2007.12 2008.01 2008.10 2008.12 2009.02
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29 April, 2007
woooooooooooooooooooooooooo
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! finally! his side came over juz now n called it officially over!!!! yippee!!! im so happy man!!!! finally! finally! a finale!! hehe. niwaes. me n irul got bk together. its dat lil' ting called luf. otherwise stupidity. hekz. made him promise he'll never get involved wif his farking idiotic cuzzin najib n frenz nimore. no way. dey are nothing but trouble. no more k beby? short entry. but worth every single word of it. hehe.
26 April, 2007
had a nightmare yesterday. bout irul. bastard #2. in my nightmare, he was at the chalet farking sum gal n forgotten all about me. in my drim i came down n forced dem to let me in but dey wun. i woke up drenched in sweat. i tink its e fear of being left again. for another person. drims lyk dis are usually true for me. so wen i woke up i called lin again. n she told me dat yesh e bastard was der. stayed over for e nite. stayed for their party. which he promised he wun. so god noes wat happens at the party. n i dun wana noe. i'll juz take my drim as e truth, n it may seem unfair, but he was unfair to me by lying to me. so dats it. its over.
yesh. khairul anwar. we're over n done wif. i dun nid u in my life. get e fark out. its dat feeling. e feeling e other bastard gave me wen he wen missing on me. every single day i kept thinking wat i did wrong, n whether he was ok. every single day i was haunt by nightmares. now. no more. i wun allow dis to disrupt my life again. ever. maybe singlehood wuld b a much better choice but i'd be damned bored. so. applications are opened now. noe any good guys? pass dem to me k? so. school. everythings been fine all along. except i think e guy who did relief for me before i came, has a huge problem wif me. he's lyk not co-operative, refuses to gif my classes works n marks, n nw i haf to key in for their CA1 soon. n chivalry is so dead wif him. once, i dropped a bunch of stuff about 2m away from him. he didnt even bother to come n help me even tho i was carrying huge boards. once i was done picking up, i looked up n saw him looking away n moving off. i mean, even if u didnt see me, u cn hear me! i was onli 2m away!!! such a chauvinist pig. niwaes. but e kids here love dis shorty. apparently i heard he brought dem out bowling n stuff. harh. bootlicker. well. well. well. mister alvin gan. u will onli b a relier teacher here. juz relief. hakz. bingit jek. everytime he walks past my desk im wishing he wuld trip n fell. hehe.
25 April, 2007
yesterday my cuzzin from my dad's side msgd me syaing he saw dat bastard wif another gal at bedok, hugging n basically PDA. im so pissed. come on lah! get it over n done wif oreadi. he's tying me down yet potraying to the world wat a huge bastad he is. im so sick of people telling me all dis shit. mum insists on tkaing his side, saying dat irul is still in e wrong knowing dat im still somebody's tunang n blah blah blah. i tink she's still in denial lah. WTF. den she msgd dat bastard n told him my cuzzin saw him n he still haf e cheek to gif sum bullsgitting story saying dat he 'nids to see other people to forget me'. PAHETIC BASTARD. GET A LIFE.
niwaes. dis irul another bastard. playing MIA wif me today. im so siiiiiiiicccccckkkkkkk of guys oreadi!!!!! fucking bingit sakk. i noe he's at najib chalet n for sure sumthing happened yesterday nite coz i msgd najib n his galfren n neither responded me. so OBVIOUSLY. fuck. fuck. FUCK. called his hp since morniing n now its been cut. BINGIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wateva. im done wif him. peeps. i nid a new boifren. HELP. so. today had a better day wif my form class. had a talk wif dem. asked dem wats e problem n stuff. i juz cant bring myself to punish dem even tho sum of dem were playing cards in my class. i mean, i gif u face, cant u even haf e decency to do my werk?!?! but. dey finally understood my rules n regulations n agreed to do my werk. finally. getting my way n giving dem wat dey want. i juz duno how to be strict wif dem. i mean. dey are still human rite? i noe how irritating it is wen a teacher juz comes in class n statrs screaming n everything. ure deemed to hate e teacher. i dun wana b hated. i'll be der for quite sumtym u noe. k. im quite pissed to continue dis entry. nitez.
18 April, 2007
juz returned from my co-form class. man. dey hurt me. dey are not even sympathetic. even wen i said i didnt want to co-form dem animore. even wen i said i didnt wana teach dem animore. n even wen i said i dun wana be a teacher animore. all dey siad was 'ok bye cher'. and dis is lyk one of e express classes.
had a bz day today. went to relief sec 1 express class. smart kids. had dem do sum complicating mazes. dey had fun in a very quiet way. tee-hee. den followed my colleague to her science class with my sec 1 technical students whom i now loved dearly. dey are much more willing to listen and talk to me now. thou we're oni left wif 1 more lesson before dey hit e exams. im reali, reali upset wif my co-form class. dis is not wat i expected from dem. e 1st 2-3 wks wif dem was way more better den dis. but now. dey are juz stepping on me. making me fil so worthless. i so fil lyk crying now. i duno wat i did to make dem do dis to me... tell me?
17 April, 2007
![]() the grosteque part1 ![]() the grosteque part 2 ![]() the grosteque part 3 ![]() the one wif e bastard's name.haha. my arms after removal of bandage..2 wks more til e scabs fall off den we'll see hw much has been erased. can u imagine e pain im going thru while lasering it off?!?! haixxx. wat to do. gatal kan. amek ko. niwaes. enjoy. hehe.
16 April, 2007
the one wif sis n her bf. the one after the haircut part 1. aka the one wif the faggort face. hehe. the one after the haircut part2. the one wif the new haircut part 3. another monday in school. as always, loadsa free tym today. oni relieving later @ 1055 onwards. den miting at Ang Mo Kio Sec regarding dis yr's O levels papers. haixx. niwaes. yesterday had loadsa fun wif sis n her bf n hubby @ town. we were from her house den decided to go town watch movie, n as always sis shopped a bit. so me n hubby went to cut hair. short for us both. den we watched "smokin in the ashes". the one where alicia keys starred as an assassin. n is a horribly confusing movie. its about different groups of people (punks, ex-police and assasins) looking for dis mafia, whom own men are also after. but. the FBI were sent down to take him away or arrest him or smthg for their own use. so in the end loadsa killing. FBI got the mafia coz dey wanted his heart to save his 'oreadi so old' dying dad. it was a mistake made years ago by the FBI to haf shot the mafia's dad n fragment him into i dunno wat. so the last piece is juz e heart. so dis young FBI who risked his life for nothing and got his friend sacrificed locked himself into the wards of e father n son n pulled their lifelines. n surrended his FBI pledge. dats e end. wat i dun gt it why so many is after e mafia wen in e end dey had nothing to do wif it coz in e 1st place it was e FBI's who wanted his heart. haix. but thanx to yuz for the movie n tidbits n i promise it will b our turn next tym round. weird thing is dat it seems dat yuz n hubby seems to get along quite ok. i wuldnt say well yet but ok. at least dey talk n haf topics to share. n dats e 1st tym i see yuz behaving lyk a human being n being able to participate in dis kinda activities. in all it was a lot of fun. mish ma sis oready. hmph.
15 April, 2007
found dis in an email. sumting interesting bout november babies.
---------------NOVEMBER BABY -------------------- Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun.Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towardsyour inner and outer beauty and independentpersonality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless andindependent. Can hold their own. Stands out in acrowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, thegreatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. didi's name erased.... my swooping eagle deleted... haha. pix of my bandaged hands. me nw at nico house, juz sitting ard talking to sis n irul. bandages cums out tomorrow. haix. gona go thru one more tym of peeling e gauze tomorrow, den putting the burnaid...2 wks more of itching and peeling of excess skin..will take pix once e gauze gets off..gross you guys out pulak..hehe... niwaes. went shopping wip sis, yuz n hubby. bought myself n sis pants from hani brown. tomorrow going to cut hair wip hubby pulak. shuld get myself sumting to wear also. no more clothes to wear to school man. also nid new makeup. halamak. ni mcm gaji pon boleh habis seh. well at least paid off important things oreadi. gave mum n dad 200. paid off my bill. stil nid to save sum money for rainy days but stil got so many things to get. haiyoh. ni lah manusia. tk pernah cukup. hehe. wat to do. oni a trainee. reali hope im eligible for NIE. daddy wants me to get a car. but den. how to survive seii? memang lah senang for me n everyone else so dat mum dun haf to send me to werk in e mornings n easier for me to go places. much much comfort too. been checking out the car cherry qq. but per mth is S$294. den petrol tkya kire ker?!? season parking lagi...haixx.....tgk lah mcm mane. den wana enrol bike. gona get down to it by next wk. no more delaying. hehe. hubby been werking for 4 complete days oready! (actuali 3 half oni lah but stil.) hope dis tym he's for real n ease up my burden abit. lets pray for e best. hubby, hope u wun disappoint me dis tym. n stop irritating me. n finding fault wif me everyday. im oreadi being my veri best to be soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo setia to you but u kip on creating stories n hurting us. its getting old la dear. stop it k. lup u. hehe. ok. uploaded pix from sis n dad's bday..over a mth nyer seh!!! the one dad's grumpy face. the one wif mum and dad eating ice cream. the one wif my lovely sis. the one wif e swenson's ice cream cone. yummy!
13 April, 2007
juz came bk frm my 2nd laser treatment. hurts more den e 1st one! gosh. i ended up crying. malu sakk. so now every movement of mine is so e limited. da sakit2 gni pon org nk carik pasal. bingit sakk. dah lah. no mood to continue dis entry pon. gna take sm pix before every single ink is being erased. so-called 'in loving memory' lah konon. hehe.
11 April, 2007
sum free tym in school before i nid to get into e next class. perspiring lyk crazy man. wishing dat e laser treatment will erase my tattoos even faster now. cant take it wearing long sleeves to sch every single day.
finally. today hubby went to werk. oh yar. bn sumtym since i updated bout my luf life. i told dd dat i noe n dat its tym he get lost from my life. he kept on crying n begging me n saying n telling me how he's changed n stuff but nope, i stood my ground. i finally made my choice. i noe dat he's not e one for me n finally Allah has proven to me. so dis wkend, his mum is to call my mum up n call everything off. finally! so me nw wip irul oni lah. me hubby. e both of us has made it so far nw n if anione's counting; its bn 8mths nw...4 more mths to a complete year! ders definitely more downs den ups in our relationship. and im still waiting for him to change himself. harapkan muker jek tk cukup ok?!? hehe. i noe he's gna read dat. i hope and pray dat Allah will finally settle me down wif him. no more changing around. too much trauma in my life. his family has been great. especially his aunts n uncles. ooh. n his cuzzin najib n galfren, lin, will b getting married dis year. 20.07.2007. best kan?!?! tapi hubby. kiter wait dulu jek k. asik gaduh jek kawin mampos nnt k. hekz. i reali hope dis tym round ure true to ur words about making dis chg in urself. k 5 more mins to class. gota get ready. update more later. (n yesh wanie. im trying to update every now n den. hehe.)
04 April, 2007
its been 3 wks in sch now. yesh, still handling well. been the toughest 3 wks ive ever been thru as an art teacher thou. firstly, i was spotted for my dressing: too low-cut or too short or too 'one of them' as in not showing my authority which is kinda dumb. wat bout those other chinese teachers who wore sleeveless which sumtys portrayed their colorful bra straps?! or those others wearing shirts which showed off their belly buttons?! racist lah wat else. den i was spotted for my tongue stud WHICH i never wore in school. at 1st i kept forgetting to get it out weneva i get to sch in e mornings, but i always take it out before lesson starts. now i take it out BEFORE i reach school. den i was chided for being 'too firendly' to the kids, which was kinda stupid. haixx. den i was spotted for my lesson plan note book coz i kinda decorated wif my forte and trademark of bikini gals in maxim. i mean dats my personal stuff man! so i had to change my notebook and throw out e old one. my sec 1 technical kids are still up to mischieves but my rapport wif dem are much better now. i talked to some of the kids der and it turns out dat dey are quite ok. not e veri notorios bunch dat i made dem out to be. instead, in dis sch its those smarties in e express classes dat i resent. maybe becoz of e way i think dat teachers here juz dun get. i dun believe in express kids are e best or watsoeva. humanely, i tink technical n academic kids are way much more better den those stucked-up express kids. express kids dun listen to u. especially during art lessons. and here i am trying my best making e lessons as interetsing as i can but not appreciated. attitudal irritating bunch of stuck up kids.
hakz. but in all. im stil holding on. wish me luck. crossing my fingers. |